Boxd…Dreams Made of Waffles

Under the category of goddamn genius, you'll find Boxd located in Carlsbad, California. Kay and I stopped by Boxd while visiting California and couldn't believe how simple yet effective this business is. If you like waffles (who doesn't) then this place is for you. The menu is simple, it's waffle sandwiches filled with whatever you want (eggs, bacon, fruit...) (Insert Kay: You take a waffle. Put some shit in the middle. Fold it over. Then you eat it. Done and Done…Bananas and Nutella Waffle…drooling just thinking about it). They have a seating area on the street corner and they've landscaped it to look like a small park. (Insert Kay: Of course, it IS Sunny Southern California, ...so, it's easier to have a year-round outdoor restaurant. Might be a little harder on the East Coast. Grrr, stupid Maryland weather.) After polishing of my waffle sandwich, I thought this about the entire setup.

Ask yourself, what would be better than hand crafted waffle sandwiches sold out of a shipping container in a small public park? Nothing, asshole. If I were ever going to rip off an idea, this would be it. Here is my business plan:

1) acquire shipping container
2) buy waffle iron and small griddle
3) rent a small space in city
4) make money

When (note I said when) you visit Carlsbad, make sure you take time to stop by and visit Boxd. They aren't open late so plan on breakfast or lunch (I refuse to say brunch since only douches use that word). If you don't have time to take a trip to the west coast, you can simply stop by our own version of Boxd here in Frederick, MD once we get it going. If any of you assholes rip off my ripped off idea and start this here before we do, you'll need to add step 5 to your business plan (receive ass whooping). And for a rating, obviously, we're going with a Hell Yeah here.

The Loveless Cafe

Kay and I were in Nashville for a few days with some friends to celebrate New Year's. I had a few things to check off my list while we were visiting. Riding a mechanical bull was at the top of the list, but, unfortunately too much BBQ and too many beers foiled that plan. And hitting up the Loveless Cafe for breakfast was at the top of the list too. Luckily, I was able to convince my friends to drive about 20 minutes outside of town to this little slice of heaven, otherwise known as The Loveless Cafe, and eat the best biscuits they would ever eat for the rest of their life. Bold statement but it is fact.

When we arrived, Kay ran in to put in our name for a table for 6. She came out to tell us how long the wait was going to be (Insert Kay: Wait for it…) 2 HOURS! Two hours, Eff me in the A! Two GD hours for breakfast, WTF! The line of people sitting around outside and the fact that it was Sunday morning should have been an indication that the wait would be long, but seriously 2 effing hours is a long time to wait when all you want is some food after a long night of beers and rockabilly. I figured my friends would want to roll out but surprisingly they decided to give it a go. It couldn't actually be two hours could it?

So while waiting, we decided to check out the gift shops that are also on the property. For anyone who visits the Loveless, this is a must. As I said, they serve the best biscuits of your life and you can purchase the mix at their store or online here. Just mix with buttermilk and biggity friggin bam— biscuits, biatch! So after getting my biscuit mix, the wait for our name proceeded. While eating some snacks from the store our name was called. The wait was only around an hour and fifteen, shy of two hours but still a long time. (Insert Kay: Jay and I had been to The Loveless once before, so we knew the wait was worth it. But, I seriously don't know how we convinced our friends to stay and wait that long! Jedi Mind tricks and all.)

Upon entering, be sure to check out some of the autographs of the famous assholes that have visited this place. I'm surprised they didn't ask me for an autograph but I'll let it slide. (Insert Kay: Lame, Jay So, lame.) We were seated and quickly greeted by the friendly (yet super busy) wait staff and everyone in our party ordered the family style breakfast to share among the six of us. (Insert Kay: So, after some fierce competitions of word finds and fill-in-the-blanks on the paper placemats...I came in second. Jay came in last probably…) Eggs, bacon, home fries and the other normal breakfast goodies were quickly brought to the table. Oh and the biscuits, have I mentioned the biscuits? (Insert Kay: Not to mention all the homemade preserves—peach, blackberry, strawberry and more—to spread on the biscuits, heavenly biscuits) The first few minutes of eating were mainly grunts and points to pass plates as we were all starving, especially after the long wait. I knew the biscuits were going to be on point but one thing I overlooked was the bacon. One of my friends can be quoted as saying it's the best bacon he has ever eaten and this guy knows all about smoked meat (and by smoked meat I mean....you get where I'm going). (Insert Kay: Seriously, the bacon was amazing. We took a pile of bacon back to our hotel room and even ate it cold. It was still THAT EFFING GOOD!) The food was good and it kept coming, you can't beat all you can eat. The waitress did a great job keeping up, the restaurant was packed.

So to sum it up: Bacon? Good. Biscuits? Good. The wait? Sucked balls, but not their fault (Sunday breakfast in the south and all). As far as a rating goes, we'll give it a hell yeah. If you're ever in Nashville make sure to check this place out. It's off the beaten path but well worth it y'all (in the south, sentences don't end with a period, they end with "y'all"). (Insert Kay: And we are still enjoying the Loveless biscuits, we've been making some every weekend! Hell yeah!)

PS-We apologize for the lack of photos in this post. We blame it on Kay's stupid iphone deleting all her Nashville photos. Kay is a dumb bitch. Fact.

Alexander's

First, we wanted to apologize for the delay in posts. What can we say, we've been total and complete slackers. It happens. We do what we want… 

OK, so we don't typically make it out for weekend brunch. Maybe it's because of a long-standing commitment I have on Sundays. Or maybe it's because we enjoy making weekend breakfast at home, listening to bluegrass music. Or, maybe it's because we're just too lazy on the weekends and usually lounge around for a bit in the mornings. Whatever the reason, it's just not something we usually do. So, when we were invited out last Sunday for an after-event brunch, we were happy to try it out. And, even better, we got to go Alexanders in Buckeystown, MD—somewhere neither of us had been.

Our brunch party met at Alexander's at Buckeystown, located (ironically) in Buckeystown, MD. (Insert Jay: That's not irony you dumb bitch. "Incidentally" or "Conveniently" is what you meant to use. Irony was when that douche thought he could live among grizzlies to learn how to protect them. End result, the douche was eaten by one and a park ranger killed the grizzly for eating him, exactly what he raising awareness against. What is it with broads using the word "irony" incorrectly? Take Alanis Morissette, she wrote an entire song called Ironic and there is not one lyric in it that is ironic. Rain on your wedding day is bad luck not ironic and the rest of the song is about waiting too long to make a good decision...., Bitches.) (Insert Kay: Rant much? …and back to the review…) Buckeystown, just a few miles outside of Frederick, is one of those small towns that if you blink, you'll literally pass it. Luckily, we had our handy iphone GPS's, so we found it without any problems. (OK, so really, you won't have trouble finding the restaurant, it's one of like two businesses in the area.) Alexander's is located in a quaint, federal-style home that was originally built in 1780. The restaurant vibe is very comforting and homey, with the dining areas separated by different rooms of the house. Honestly, it feels like going to your grandmothers house for a meal. Per their website, Alexander's self described themselves as having "antebellum surroundings" with a "fresh approach" to "southern comfort food". Word. (antebellum, they really used that in their description!)

Upon sitting down, we were quickly greeted by our waiter, and drinks as well as cinnamon buns arrived promptly. (I don't usually like cinnamon buns, but I was starving, and I'm so glad I ate them—they were really, really good!) Jay went with the Omelette (with an extra order of bacon—the guy can eat!). I went with…wait for it…chicken and waffles. Yes. I said it. They. Have. Chicken. AND. Waffles! (Insert Jay: the only thing better than chicken and waffles is this, tell it Luda!) Jay doesn't quite remember what exactly was in his omelette (in his exact words "i don't know, it was filled with omelette shit). Thanks Dear. But, he does remember it being really good, and he ate all of it. The bacon was really smoked. Which, was good at first bite, but then became overpowering. For me, the chicken and waffles were amazing! (Insert Jay: the syrup or sizzurp as I like to say, was really good. Some pecan pepper shit that was tasty.) So, so good!

All in all, we were really impressed with Alexander's and wondered why we didn't do brunch more often! (Insert Jay: I actually don't wonder why. Brunch is for a-holes that like to use words like brunch.) The service was a little slow, but we were with a very large party, so it's hard to tell if that was normal or not. I was impressed with how quickly and easily our checks were split up for a party of like 16ish people. We'd give it a "Good Enough to Take Your Parents To", (which you actually probably should do!) and will try going back for a taste of lunch or dinner!

PS: Alexanders is currently participating in Frederick's Restaurant Week. While we didn't try one of their special dishes, I'd encourage everyone to try to grab a meal there during this weekend, the tail end of Restaurant Week!