Wednesday, January 23, 2013

The Loveless Cafe


Kay and I were in Nashville for a few days with some friends to celebrate New Year's. I had a few things to check off my list while we were visiting. Riding a mechanical bull was at the top of the list, but, unfortunately too much BBQ and too many beers foiled that plan. And hitting up the Loveless Cafe for breakfast was at the top of the list too. Luckily, I was able to convince my friends to drive about 20 minutes outside of town to this little slice of heaven, otherwise known as The Loveless Cafe, and eat the best biscuits they would ever eat for the rest of their life. Bold statement but it is fact.

When we arrived, Kay ran in to put in our name for a table for 6. She came out to tell us how long the wait was going to be (Insert Kay: Wait for it…) 2 HOURS! Two hours, Eff me in the A! Two GD hours for breakfast, WTF! The line of people sitting around outside and the fact that it was Sunday morning should have been an indication that the wait would be long, but seriously 2 effing hours is a long time to wait when all you want is some food after a long night of beers and rockabilly. I figured my friends would want to roll out but surprisingly they decided to give it a go. It couldn't actually be two hours could it?

So while waiting, we decided to check out the gift shops that are also on the property. For anyone who visits the Loveless, this is a must. As I said, they serve the best biscuits of your life and you can purchase the mix at their store or online here. Just mix with buttermilk and biggity friggin bam— biscuits, biatch! So after getting my biscuit mix, the wait for our name proceeded. While eating some snacks from the store our name was called. The wait was only around an hour and fifteen, shy of two hours but still a long time. (Insert Kay: Jay and I had been to The Loveless once before, so we knew the wait was worth it. But, I seriously don't know how we convinced our friends to stay and wait that long! Jedi Mind tricks and all.)

Upon entering, be sure to check out some of the autographs of the famous assholes that have visited this place. I'm surprised they didn't ask me for an autograph but I'll let it slide. (Insert Kay: Lame, Jay So, lame.) We were seated and quickly greeted by the friendly (yet super busy) wait staff and everyone in our party ordered the family style breakfast to share among the six of us. (Insert Kay: So, after some fierce competitions of word finds and fill-in-the-blanks on the paper placemats...I came in second. Jay came in last probably…) Eggs, bacon, home fries and the other normal breakfast goodies were quickly brought to the table. Oh and the biscuits, have I mentioned the biscuits? (Insert Kay: Not to mention all the homemade preserves—peach, blackberry, strawberry and more—to spread on the biscuits, heavenly biscuits) The first few minutes of eating were mainly grunts and points to pass plates as we were all starving, especially after the long wait. I knew the biscuits were going to be on point but one thing I overlooked was the bacon. One of my friends can be quoted as saying it's the best bacon he has ever eaten and this guy knows all about smoked meat (and by smoked meat I mean....you get where I'm going). (Insert Kay: Seriously, the bacon was amazing. We took a pile of bacon back to our hotel room and even ate it cold. It was still THAT EFFING GOOD!) The food was good and it kept coming, you can't beat all you can eat. The waitress did a great job keeping up, the restaurant was packed.

So to sum it up: Bacon? Good. Biscuits? Good. The wait? Sucked balls, but not their fault (Sunday breakfast in the south and all). As far as a rating goes, we'll give it a hell yeah. If you're ever in Nashville make sure to check this place out. It's off the beaten path but well worth it y'all (in the south, sentences don't end with a period, they end with "y'all"). (Insert Kay: And we are still enjoying the Loveless biscuits, we've been making some every weekend! Hell yeah!)



PS-We apologize for the lack of photos in this post. We blame it on Kay's stupid iphone deleting all her Nashville photos. Kay is a dumb bitch. Fact.

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