Saturday, February 16, 2013

Madrones


In a failed attempt to eat at Buffalo Wild Wings, Kay and I found ourselves at Madrones (their website is a .net…amateur hour) over in the Clemson Corner shopping center in Frederick, MD. Prior to entering the restaurant, Kay and I argued over whether or not this was a chain. Judging by the location, neon sign, and logo, all signs pointed to yes. But, after we both did some research, it appears that it is not a chain afterall (but I'm still not convinced.)

When we entered the restaurant, everything said chain steakhouse. Fake stone fireplace, a shitload of tables/booths, deer antler lights and a douche behind the bar. The Janet Jackson (I call her Ms. Jackson, cuz I'm nasty) playing on the house stereo did throw me, though. (Insert Kay: Yes, I was shocked that Jay knew this old 'skool' Janet Jackson reference too! "No my first name ain't baby!") We were quickly greeted by the hostess who was wearing a low cut shirt complemented with a huge rack, a plus in any guy's book. Unfortunately she wasn't our server so that was a minus. (Insert Kay: Yeah. I was super upset.)

Our server was quick to arrive since there wasn't a lot people in the place. (Insert Kay: It was like a Monday night). He took our drink order and gave us a few minutes to look over the menu. (Insert Kay: While we didn't get drinks this time around, Madrone's drink menu seemed really extensive. They had a wall filled with whiskey and other liquor bottles, plus a good selection of craft beers.) After viewing the menu, I realized I was wrong about the steakhouse theme, this joint was just normal American fare. Our waiter returned to take our order and proceeded to break rule #1. He immediately turned to me and said "I'll take your order first, sir". Look, I'll admit that I'm the biggest asshole I know, (Insert Kay: Truer words have never been spoken) but even I know you always take the broad's order first. I looked over at Kay when he said that and just gave her the "did that shit just happen?" look. Apparently it did, so I quickly got over it and ordered the hickory burger. Kay ordered the grilled portobellos & goat cheese pasta.



Our food arrived in a timely manner. But to be honest, it was rather boring. I wasn't impressed and I wasn't disappointed. It was the most non exciting meal I've had in a long time. I may or may not have fallen asleep in the middle of it. It was kind of like hitting LC's behind the dumpsters in shop class. (Insert Kay: Jay, what the hell are you talking about!?) That statement makes no sense (stop trying to figure it out asshole) and that's how I felt after the meal. (Insert Kay: Oh.)  (Insert Kay: While my meal looked promising, it was WAY too salty. As in drink-3-full-glasses-of-water salty. I couldn't even finish half of it. And holy goat cheese balls....it was just a lot of cheese. If you really like cheese, you may like this dish, it was just too much for me)

After finishing our meals, we wrapped up the check and simply headed home. I did catch a good look of the boobie hostess on the way out. I gave her my best pick up line (seen here), not sure how she took it though. As far as a rating, we'd give this one an "eh". Onto the next venture. (Insert Kay: Since this restaurant has only just recently opened, I may try it again in a few months. We've heard a lot of people really enjoy their food here, so maybe we just hit them on an off night?)